Allah has blessed us with 2 beautiful and healthy My husband is of the opinion that in this day and age it's enough. He does not want more kids. I If I talk to him, and tell him, that I would like to have another baby he sometimes get's angry or tells me he will get a vasectomy. I do not want him to do haraam, but I long to have another child, inshaAllah. Can I refuse to have intercourse with him, when he is using protection or am I not allowed to. If he is not changing his mind, am I allowed to ask him for divorce? Or is it better to stay with him for the sake of the children and put my desires last?.<\/p>","answer":"
Firstly: <\/p>\r\n
Having a lot of children is something that is encouraged in Islam and the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) urged Muslims to do that. Abu Dawood (2050) narrated that Ma’qil ibn Yazaar (may Allah be pleased with him) said: A man came to the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) and said: “O Messenger of Allaah, I have found a woman who is from a good family and is beautiful, but she does not bear children; should I marry her?” He told him not to. Then he came to him a second time and said something similar and he told him not to marry her. Then he came to him a third time and said something similar and he (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Marry the one who is loving and fertile, for I will be proud of your great numbers.” <\/p>\r\n
Classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Irwa’ al-Ghaleel<\/em>, 1784. <\/p>\r\n Hence the couple should be keen to have a lot of children and be happy about that and show gratitude for the blessing that Allah has bestowed upon them. <\/p>\r\n Secondly: <\/p>\r\n It is permissible to delay having children for a certain amount of time if that serves an interest, such as if the woman is weak or sick. But it is not permissible to do that for fear of poverty or for fear of raising the children, because that implies thinking negatively of Allah, may He be exalted. <\/p>\r\n It says in a statement of the Islamic Fiqh Council belonging to the Muslim World League: The Islamic Fiqh Council affirms unanimously that it is not permissible to limit the number of children in general and it is not permissible to prevent pregnancy if the reason for doing that is fear of poverty, because Allah is the Provider and Owner of great power, and there is no living creature on earth but its provision is due from Allah, or if that is for other reasons that are not acceptable according to sharee’ah. <\/p>\r\n As for using means of preventing or delaying pregnancy in individual cases where there real and certain harm will result from it, such as if the pregnant woman will have to give birth in a manner other than that which is usual, and she will have to have surgery to bring the child forth, in which case there is nothing in sharee’ah to prevent her doing that. The same applies if it is delayed for other legitimate shar’i or health reasons confirmed by a trustworthy Muslim doctor. Contraception becomes a must in a case where it is proven that harm would result for the mother or there is the fear that she may die, according to the opinion of a trustworthy Muslim doctor. End quote from Fataawa Islamiyyah<\/em>, 3\/200. <\/p>\r\n Shaykh Ibn ‘Uthaymeen (may Allah have mercy on him) was asked: Is it permissible to use birth control so that a person has a child every five years, because he sees the corruption in society and would not be able to raise a lot of children close in age in this overwhelmingly corrupt society? <\/p>\r\n He replied: So long as this is the intention, then it is not permissible to do this, because it reflects a lack of trust in Allaah with regard to the hadeeth of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) who said “Marry the one who is loving and fertile…” <\/p>\r\n But if the birth control has to do with the condition of the woman – because she cannot cope with repeated pregnancies – this may be permissible, but it is better not to do it.<\/p>\r\n